it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize