Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
