When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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