We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
