i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
