Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
