You can't motorboat a personality
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
