So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
