woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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