i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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