ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Randomize
