Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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