That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
