He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
