I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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