Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
