they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Plan B is the new Plan A
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
she looked like the before picture.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
