Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I want her autograph on my taint
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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