We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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