Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
