does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
