i may or may not be watching the land before time
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
