why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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