Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
