Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
