I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
