Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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