So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
