Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
