Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
