i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize