And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
