dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
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