i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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