The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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