so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
