Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
