My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Randomize