He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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