I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
