I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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