is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
