Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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