last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
