i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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