You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
worst night to have a conscience
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
you made out with another girl for some wings
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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