i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
