i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
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