He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
