She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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